Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Alpha Tip: Switch Your Workouts

An important part of the MAP is getting physically fit.  For the past few months, I’ve been using the Stronglifts 5x5 program. It’s a great program, and it’s worked well for me.

Last weekend I was at a Barnes and Noble store with some time to kill. I remembered another blogger recommended the book “Starting Strength,” so I headed to the Health and Fitness section to look for it. They didn’t have it in the store, but they did have The New Rules of Lifting. It looked interesting, so I bought it.

Yesterday I did the first workout from the beginners section of The New Rules. On paper, this should have been much easier than the 5x5 workout I did the week before. It wasn’t. At the end of the workout my arms and legs felt like they were made of jelly. Today my abs are sore, especially at the top near my ribcage, an area that’s never felt sore before. This “easier” workout is using different muscles, and the same muscles in a different way, than my previous workout.

Here are a couple of basic rules for working out:

Do Something. Any workout is better than doing nothing. Buy a book, find a website, look at some YouTube videos. Pick a workout and get started.

Then Do Something Else. Don’t keep doing the same five or six exercises forever. Switch it up now and then. This not only has the physical benefit of stressing different muscles in different ways, it also has psychological benefits. The variety can keep you from getting bored, and that can motivate you to keep working out.

In addition to the workout plans mentioned above, here are a couple of others to consider:

Simplefit.org  This website has complete exercise plans based on bodyweight exercises. No gym memberships or expensive equipment is required.

Scooby’s Workshop Home workout plans using minimal equipment, mostly dumbbells. Good videos showing proper form for the exercises.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Alpha Move: Be Prepared

I’m kind of shocked at the number of people on Staten Island who are shocked that they aren’t getting any help, three days after Sandy hit them.

Maybe it’s because I grew up on the Gulf Coast, but I thought everyone knew certain basic facts about hurricanes and other natural disasters. One of those facts is that after every disaster, some people are surprised at how long it takes for help to arrive. This, in spite of the fact that it happens after EVERY disaster. You’d think people would figure it out.

As an Alpha male, or an Alpha in Training, YOU are the Captain of your family’s ship. That means the buck stops with you. Your family is looking to you to make sure they are safe, and you’d better do it because FEMA sure isn’t going to.

First, and I mean no disrespect to the people of Staten Island when I say this, if you live on an island, WHY ARE YOU STILL THERE during and after a hurricane? If your house is 10 feet above sea level, and the National Hurricane Center is predicting an 11 foot storm surge, the math isn’t that hard. The best way to survive a natural disaster is to not be there when it happens. West Coast residents have to deal with earthquakes, which give no warning before they hit. But everyone knew a hurricane was coming. They were warned that it was going to be bad. They had plenty of time to find somewhere else to be. And again, I’m not saying this to pick on these victims, just to point out that you shouldn’t make the same mistake.

I’m also amazed at the people who are running out of gasoline three days after the storm. That means they are either driving a lot, or they didn’t have the foresight to fill their tank the day before the storm. Look, storms knock out power. Sometimes it takes a while to get the power back on. You can’t pump gas with no electricity, so fill up ahead of the storm.

The other thing you should do is be prepared for whatever natural disasters affect your area. If you don’t live near the coast you may not have to worry about hurricanes. But winter storms can cause similar problems with widespread power outages, and inability to travel. Basic preparation is the same, whether you expect hurricanes, winter storms, or the Zombie Apocalypse.

There are certain basics that you just have to make sure you have on hand, all the time. They fall into a few basic categories:

WATER: My house has a well, so if the power is out, the water is out. Even in a city, if the power is out long enough the water will stop flowing. Water is bulky and heavy, so it’s not easy to store. But at a minimum you want a three-day supply of drinking water on hand. Figure a minimum of a gallon of water per person per day. Get a couple of those blue five-gallon water containers at Wal Mart and fill them up. Put a teaspoon of unscented chlorine bleach in each jug to kill any germs. Change it out every three months anyway.

That’s just for drinking. You’ll need water for flushing your toilet, too. One way to keep a good supply of non-potable water handy is to fill the bathtub before the power goes out.

FOOD: At a bare minimum, keep a two-week supply of non-perishable food in your house all the time. If your family eats canned and dried foods, this can be as simple as keeping stocked up on the stuff you normally eat. If you don’t eat processed foods, you might need to keep a survival kit of canned goods. Anything you buy at the supermarket needs to be rotated on a regular basis. Canned food doesn’t keep forever.

Make sure you have a way to cook this stuff after the power goes out. I come from a long line of campers, but if don’t already have a camp stove, get one.

This seems really obvious, but you’d be surprised: make sure you have a way to OPEN CANS without electricity!

For longer term storage there are better options. Do a web search on food storage, or ask a Mormon neighbor to help you out.

FUEL: Before a storm hits, fill the car with gas. I make it a general rule to never get below half a tank, but then, I’m paranoid. Make sure you have fuel for your camp stove. (Propane is the most convenient and probably the safest.) Have flashlights and extra batteries. If your house (like mine) is all-electric, figure out how you are going to keep warm in the winter. A fireplace or wood-burning stove can keep a room or two warm. There are propane camping heaters but they are meant for small tents. Kerosene heaters put out a lot of warmth but liquid fuel can be dangerous indoors. Whatever you use, keep adequate fuel available.

MISC: Paper towels, toilet paper, sanitary products, any medications you take on a regular basis.

DEFENSE: There always seems to be looting after a storm. Most of the time the looters are rummaging through empty homes and stores, but not always.  If you follow the minimal advice I’ve given above, you’ll be in better shape than 90% of your neighbors. What are you going to do if they decide to partake of some freelance socialism and redistribute your wealth? As Captain, you need to be prepared to repel boarders.

There are lots of opinions on this, and mine is far from authoritative. But this is my blog, so I’m going to tell you my opinion. And in my opinion, if you are only going to have one weapon for home defense, it should be a pump-action 12-guage shotgun. Better: in addition to the shotgun, have a rifle in the thirty-caliber neighborhood, and a handgun in a minimum of .38 caliber or 9mm. Both the rifle and shotgun should have short barrels. Tell the sporting goods store you are going to use them for hunting deer in heavily wooded areas, and you’ll get something appropriate.

Stay away from scary-looking black military-style weapons. You want something that could be used for sports like hunting or target shooting. The reason: if you should ever have to defend your family with one of these weapons, you will eventually be sitting in a courtroom while an assistant district attorney shows them to a jury. You want the jury to see you as someone who was driven by circumstances to pick up his hunting gun and defend himself, not as a vigilante survivalist who was chomping at the bit to kill someone.

That list should get you started, or at least get you thinking along the proper lines. Remember that after any significant natural disaster, it’s likely to be a minimum of three days before any kind of help arrives at all, and up to two weeks before the situation stabilizes and serious reconstruction starts.  

Homework assignment: For the next three days, take note of everything that you eat, drink, consume, or use. Ask yourself if you would miss it in the aftermath of a storm. If you would, make sure you have it on hand in your “hurricane kit.”

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Body Language

A lot has been written in the manosphere about the importance of body language. An alpha male carries himself confidently. He takes up space without apology. He stands tall and looks people in the eye.

And the opposite: looking down is a sign of submission. A lot of words have been written about this, but here's just one example: Eye Contact Game

In that link, Danger and Play tell us "If a girl looks down, she views herself as lower status than you." And "If you look down, it means you’re submissive. If you look down after making eye contact with a woman, you have subconsciously told her that you’re a worm."

Pop quiz: Below is a split-screen image from the Monday night presidential debate. Which man looks like an Alpha male, and which one looks like a submissive pussy?

Even with the sound off, it was clear who won this debate. But this isn't a political blog, and I'm not making this point to influence how you vote. My point is, you want to look like Romney, not like Obama.

The overwhelming consensus that Romney won the debate has as much to do with his and Obama's body language as it does with anything that either of them said. This stuff is important. If looking at the ground can affect the outcome of a presidential election, just imagine how it can affect your chances of getting laid.

The night of the debate was the Obama's 20th anniversary, so the leader of the free world probably got duty sex in a Denver hotel room after the debate. But I bet Mrs. Romney's panties were dripping during the limo ride back to the hotel and Mr. Romney got righteously laid Monday night.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

DHV: Have some credit

When my first marriage broke up, my credit was awful. I had a pre-paid cell phone because even the phone company wouldn’t give me credit. In my defense, I must point out that I was married to a drug addict, but I must also accept responsibility for my own bad decisions – including the decision to remain married to a drug addict for as long as I did.

As soon as we separated, I formulated a plan. I eliminated all excess spending. After alimony, nearly half my take-home pay went to paying down some very old debts. I also worked on cleaning up my credit reports. I won’t go into details here, but I found a lot of useful information at the FICO Forum.  

Three years after the separation, my credit had improved enough that I was able to buy a house. Three years after that, I was able to qualify for an American Express card. That green Amex card is a huge symbol to me, because Amex was the first credit card I ever owned, and the first one to be cancelled for missed payments. Having that card in my wallet reminds me that I am now a responsible adult.

You’ll hear a lot from guys like Dave Ramsey on why it’s important to be debt-free. And I agree with most of it. But being debt-free is not the same thing as not having credit, or not using credit. And sometimes, it’s really important to be able to pull out the credit card and handle a situation.

I was recently in just such a situation. My wife and I attended a family reunion on the other side of the country. It was an area we had never visited, and to maximize our time there we booked the last flight out of the airport the night we were scheduled to return home.

That’s where Murphy’s Law raised its ugly head. Due to mechanical problems, our flight was cancelled. Two hundred people de-planed and headed to the service counter to try to re-book their flights. When it was finally our turn, the very pleasant young man informed us that he could get us two seats on a non-stop flight home at 1:00 PM. It was currently a little after midnight.

“Don’t you have anything leaving earlier?” I really didn’t want to spend the next 13 hours in that airport.

He clicked on his keyboard for a minute. “I have a flight leaving at 9:00 AM. But you have to change planes in Chicago, with a two-hour layover. It arrives at [hometown] 20 minutes later than the non-stop.”

So we take the nonstop. “Can you provide us with a hotel room?” He explained that the airline does keep a block of rooms, but they didn’t have any more available. He gave me a pink slip of paper with an 800 number, and told me that if I called that number they could find me a discounted rate.

My wife, by this point, was getting a little bit nuts. We could see some folks from our flight bedding down in the corner at the next gate. CNN was blaring loudly on an overhead TV screen. I knew it was time to Alpha-up and be the Captain.

“Sit here with the bags,” I told her. “I’m going to go over there where it’s a little quieter, and make a phone call. Don’t panic, I’ve got this.”

I called the number on the card. They told me that they had a few rooms left near this particular airport, at a Marriott. $115 seemed like a good rate, under the circumstances. There was a free shuttle. I wrote down the confirmation number.

I went back to my wife. “Grab your bags, we’re going to the Marriott.” The relief in her eyes was visible.

Instead of a miserable night trying to sleep in an airport, wearing clothes we had been sweating in all day, we got to take hot showers and crawl between clean sheets in a comfortable bed. In the morning we enjoyed a leisurely breakfast overlooking the bay, while watching the airplanes take off from the runway that jutted out into the water. Then we took the free shuttle back to the airport, and the flight home went off without a hitch.

The “old me” wouldn’t have been able to make this happen. After carefully budgeting the trip down to the penny, I wouldn’t have had the resources to deal with the extra Benjamin for the hotel room, not to mention the extra $50 for breakfast. That little green Amex card in my wallet bought me much more than a comfortable night’s sleep and a pleasant breakfast – it let me be a hero to my wife.

And that is a great thing to be.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Alpha move: dress better

Over on Hooking Up Smart, a commenter named Cooper had some questions about why he was attracting the wrong kinds of women. It seems that he has no problem attracting women, but he’s looking for a potential Mrs. Cooper.

I’m not going to suggest that Cooper’s wardrobe is entirely responsible for his problem. There’s a lot going on here, and his clothing choice is only a small part of it. But it’s probably the easiest part to fix.

Cooper says he’s partial to “Obey shirts.” Being of a certain age, I had no idea what an Obey shirt is, so I had to check out their web site. My immediate advice to Cooper was to stop wearing them. He’s in his mid-twenties, so he may be able to get away with wearing graphic tees for a few more years. But even as young as he is, such clothing is not optimal.

I think part of Cooper’s problem is that the graphic tees send a message about him, and that message says that he’s either an adolescent or a thug. That’s directly relevant to his situation, because Red Pill dudes know that adolescents and thugs have no problem attracting women. If he wanted to be like Heartiste or RooshV and tally up a string of one-night-stands, he’d be doing fine. But Cooper is looking for a long-term relationship. Women who are attracted to adolescents and thugs are not LTR material.

A good rule of thumb is to dress one notch above those around you. If you’re a college student and your classmates are all wearing tee shirts, try wearing a polo shirt instead. If casual Friday at your office means all of the men are in polo shirts and khakis, then wear some nice wool slacks and a button down shirt. Don’t be afraid to put on a sport coat when going out to a club. If all the other men are in sport coats, wear a suit. If everyone is wearing a suit, be the guy in the bow tie or the guy with the brightly colored pocket square. 

If you’re over 30 years old, save the graphic tees for doing yard work or changing the oil in your car.

If you need some help with your wardrobe, check out Tanner over at Masculine Style.  Some of his suggestions are a bit too fashion-forward for a guy my age, but he has some good insights on how a man should dress.
Clothes may not make the man, but they do say something about him. What are your clothes saying about you?

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Alpha Advice: Buy a Motorcycle

I spent last Saturday driving my roadster much too fast on twisty mountain roads, with my wife in the passenger seat. Well, mostly in the passenger seat. I let her drive some, too.

My wife is an adrenalin junkie, so when we got back to our hotel room that night I was handsomely rewarded for scaring the crap out of her. It didn’t even matter that we were both dog tired, sunburned, and the walls were so thin we could hear the fat lesbians giggling in the next room. It was awesome.

But this post is not about getting your wife hot by riding her around in a sports car. It’s about motorcycles, and the women who love the bad boys who ride them.

One of the roads that we drove on that day is a particularly infamous stretch of US Highway 129, known as the Tail of the Dragon. At one end of this stretch of road, there’s a motel that caters to motorcyclists. And next to the motel there’s a pub and grill which serves the best burgers in the area. We ate lunch there, and since it was a Saturday in the summer time, the place was packed. We enjoyed some great people-watching along with our burgers.

There was a wide variety of people to watch. There were young dudes in leather jumpsuits driving crotch-rocket bikes, and grizzled old-timers on chopped Harleys. There were retired couples on Gold Wings, and of course, there were the sports-car guys in Polo shirts and Bermuda shorts.

The first thing that I noticed was the biker women. They ranged from the young and hot to the elderly and morbidly obese, but they all had one thing in common: No matter where they might fall on the hotness scale, every one of them was far hotter than the man she was with

Once I noticed this, I started searching in vain for the exception: surely that fat gray-haired lady… nope, her husband is wrinkled and missing half his teeth. This one looks kind of butch. Oh, that’s because her “boyfriend” is a girl. The 30-something with the bad haircut and lazy eye? Not a biker, she’s married to one of the sports car guys. In every case, if a biker dude had a woman with him, she was two to three points above him on the hotness scale. 

The conclusion is inescapable: buy a motorcycle to increase your sex rank.

N.B. – I will not be taking my own advice. I owned a motorcycle years ago, for about six weeks. In that short span I had two accidents. The first was entirely my own fault, and resulted merely in a bruised ego and some scratched paint. The second could easily have killed me, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could have done to prevent it. I’ll stick to hot two-seat convertibles, thank you very much.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

A Find! (And a book review)

I was out with my wife a couple of weeks ago and we stopped in a little consignment shop. While she was trying on clothes, I was browsing through the selection of used books on the back wall.That's where I made this remarkable find: The Game, by Neil Strauss. I'd have bought it if it was a ratty paperback, but was especially delighted to find it bound in leatherette, and decorated with gold leaf. The silk ribbon bookmark is an especially nice touch.

In spite of the binding, this is not a pickup-artist Bible. It's actually the story of how author Neil Strauss transformed himself into a pickup artist called Style, and moved into a Los Angeles mansion with Mystery. It's a memoir rather than a method, but reading it will give you some insight into the methods of the pickup artists. 

The book reads like a novel, and it's a real page-turner. After Style develops the skills to pick up any woman he wants, he begins to question what it is he really wants. He notices that the group of PUAs living in Mystery's house are more concerned with impressing each other than actually meeting women. He discovers that pickup skills are great for one-night stands, but struggles with forming lasting relationships -- too bad he didn't have the benefit of Athol Kay's writings, or The Red Pill Room, to help him with that.

Eventually the infighting and rivalries cause the residents of the house to go their separate ways. Strauss' big insight comes at the end of the book, when his girlfriend Lisa tells him she wants him to be Neil, "balding, nerdy, glasses, and all." 

He realizes that while Lisa liked "the real me," she would never have had the chance to meet him without the Game. 
I needed Mystery, Ross Jeffries, David DeAngelo, David X, Juggler, Steve P., Rasputin, and all those other pseudonyms. I needed them to discover what was me to begin with. And now that I had found that person, brought him out of his shell, and learned to accept him, perhaps I had outgrown them.
Perhaps he had. And all of us in long-term relationships can learn from his experience. The PUAs have some information we can use, but we don't want to be them. 

Monday, July 9, 2012

T-shirt Truth in Advertising?

I'm not sure why this woman chose to advertise her sex rank on her shirt, or why she's offering to show others how to achieve the same score, or why anyone would aspire to be a "3 or 4." But when I saw her in the grocery store I laughed. I just had to share this.

Like most women, she seems to over-estimate her own SR.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Road Trip!

A few weeks ago I mentioned to fellow blogger Ian Ironwood that I was planning a road trip. I'd like to think that this was his inspiration for this post. If you haven't read that, you should. I'll wait right here...

OK, back already?

I have to say, Ian's advice is spot on. I won't go into a lot of detail on my road trip, but it was an epic eight-day trek through the deep south. What I do want to say is that giving my wife a chance to miss me seems to have paid off. The night I got home we had some of the best sex ever, and since then she can't seem to keep her hands off me.

Road trip: Highly recommended!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Scheduling Intimacy

A link in my twitter feed this weekend led me to this post from Advocatus Diaboli.

He says: 
If you are scheduling something, it is almost guaranteed to be a chore.
Taking your garbage out on time, vacuuming your house regularly or doing laundry on a schedule is a chore not a need. We are talking about stuff that nobody really wants to do, or is strictly necessary at that moment, but performed for satisfying imaginary social expectations.
 To which I say: bullshit!

Healthy adult human beings schedule a lot of things that are not chores. We schedule special events like birthday parties and attending concerts. We schedule recreational activities like rock climbing or poker nights. We schedule vacations and weekend getaways.

Don't get me wrong; I'm completely in favor of unscheduled, spontaneous sex. And surprising the wife is always fun... but even that takes planning and preparation. (For the ultimate example of this, read Ian Ironwood's series on the ultimate Red Pill date.)

I have a successful career. I'm also finishing my college degree, learning to play the guitar, and this summer I'm taking a welding class at the local community college.

My wife is equally busy. She also has a successful career, and hers involves a significant amount of out of town travel. She's also an officer in a professional organization.

We have to schedule intimacy; it's the only way it's going to happen. Or at least, it's the only way it's going to happen as often as we want it to.

In our life, there are basically two kinds of scheduled sex: maintenance sex, and OMG that was amazing sex. Maintenance sex is what Athol Kay refers to as Below Average Sex. (By definition, half of all sex is below average.) "OMG that was amazing" is anything that takes more planning than grabbing the lube and jumping into bed. Role playing, fetish play, B&D, anything that takes props, costumes, and significant time, is going to require some advance preparation. And if it's going to happen, we need to set aside some time for it.

All this is not to say that married professionals never have spontaneous sex. It happens, and when it does it's a wonderful thing. But scheduled sex is not comparable to taking out the garbage, either.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012


My wife sent me a text to let me know that a package arrived in the mail. It was Androgel, a testosterone supplement, from my prescription plan.

The irony is that the auto-correct on her phone changed "Androgel" to "shrivel." Uh, quite the opposite, actually.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

War On Men -- College Edition

Minding the Campus has a story on the University of North Carolina's response to the Obama education department's notorious "Dear Colleague" letter.
Under the current system at UNC, if an accuser simply files a sexual assault claim through the university but doesn't go to the police, the accused student has no right to outside counsel. "Neither a licensed attorney nor a person who has passed a state bar examination may serve as the investigator or defense counsel or be present during proceedings." If the accuser has simultaneously filed a criminal charge, "the accused student may be accompanied to the hearing by a licensed attorney who may confer with the student during the hearing so long as the attorney does not address the hearing panel, those hearing the appeal, or other parties or witnesses, and so long as the attorney does not delay or disrupt the proceeding." [emphasis added] And in either case, the right of the accused student to present evidence to clear his name is severely limited by a clause that prohibits presentation of evidence that "does not otherwise infringe the rights of other students." This is the procedure that Dean Manning had considered unfairly tilted against the accuser.
 There's a mistake in that quote... evidence is only ALLOWED (not prohibited) if it "does not otherwise infringe the rights of other students."

More importantly, the new policy  removes accusations of sexual assault from the UNC Honor Code, and treats them differently. Under the Honor Code, guilt must be proven beyond a reasonable doubt, just as in a criminal trial. But now, sexual assault accusations only need to be proven "by a preponderance of the evidence." That is, the most serious charges only need to be shown to be 50.1% likely to be true.

A male student at UNC can be expelled, have is educational career and his life destroyed, on the flimsiest of evidence and without the benefit of legal counsel. How could any man choose to put himself into such a situation? How could any parents allow their sons to be put into such situations? Did we learn nothing from the recent events at Duke?

To be fair, this is not unique to UNC. The Tarheels are merely the first school to go on record as complying with the Obama administration's mandate

As one commenter on Minding the Campus said, "How in the world do you teach an 18year old boy that he has to protect himself from any woman he meets...that at the whim of a partner his life can be ruin?"

Monday, April 16, 2012

Chivalry is only dead if you let it be dead

Dalrock has a new post today, in which he takes a writer at the Canadian Post to task for her article on the anniversary of the Titanic sinking. Of course, the CP was asking for it when they titled the article: Titanic Anniversary: Is a man brave or condescending if he lets women and children go first?

How dare those awful men let themselves drown in the icy North Atlantic! Equality demands that men fight their way into the lifeboats, "women and children first" be damned!

I grew up reading tales of male gallantry from King Arthur and his knights, right on down to the Hardy Boys. Call me old-fashioned, but I still think it's the man's job to slay dragons (and spiders). Men are the rescuers, and women are the rescued.

It took a while, but I eventually managed to get my wife trained to wait for me to open her car door. It's a small gesture, but it's symbolic. A feminist would say that it's symbolic of my need to control my wife, or that I'm suggesting she's not capable of opening her own door. That, like most things that feminists say, is bullshit. It's a gesture of kindness and respect. It's a masculine duty, although modern society deprecates such notions.

You also won't see my wife pushing a lawn mower or taking the trash can down to the curb. Those are "man jobs" at our house. I'm aware that my wife is plenty capable of opening doors, pushing lawnmowers, and toting trash. She does much tougher jobs, like putting in a new flower bed, for fun. But if I sat on the porch with a beer in my hand while she mowed the yard, my grandfather's ghost would pay me a nocturnal visit to ask where my genitals had gone.

What does this have to do with Game? Why, everything!  Game, properly understood, IS a modern version of Chivalry. Like the knight on a quest, the man who has taken the red pill must go his own way. Like the medieval man, the man who knows Game knows the weakness of women, and the need to protect them. Contrary to feminist rhetoric, you are stronger than your wife; or at least, you should be.

Chivalry is noble by it's very definition. As John Huizinga said, "the source of the chivalrous idea, is pride aspiring to beauty, and formalized pride gives rise to a conception of honour, which is the pole of noble life."

So have some pride, and give rise to honor. Don't let the feminists take away chivalry.

Monday, April 9, 2012

What Men Want From Women

This was posted on The Private Man. It was actually a comment someone left on another blog, but he felt it was worth reposting. And he's right, it bears repeating, over and over again.

What men want from women:

We want you to celebrate with us when we’ve triumphed.
We want you to help us through when we’re down.
We want you to stay with us when we’re down.
We want you to not be constantly looking for a better model.
We want you to encourage us when things aren’t going well.
We want a simple, heartfelt “I love you” at the end of a tough day.
We want you to show us and tell us that we satisfy you sexually.
We want you to show us that we are still attractive to you physically.
A man NEVER gets tired of hearing from his woman how great she thinks he is. NEVER. You can’t say it enough. If you do say it, you will have his undying love.
He will work himself into an early grave at a job he hates for you and your children. He will gladly throw himself in front of speeding cars for you. He will gladly lay down his life for you. He will give you all he is, all he has, all his money, and all the resources he can bring to bear.
And all he asks in return is for tenderness, a pleasant disposition, physical affection at reasonable intervals, and that you stay with him.
Why is that so hard to figure out?
The Private Man also offers the answer to the question "Why is that so hard to figure out?" It's because women (and men) fall into the vicious circle of lies and misinformation.