Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Aleph One Gets the Red Pill

I shouldn't have had any need for the Red Pill. I mean, I already knew this stuff.

For the last five years of Marriage #1, my hobby was banging bored middle-aged housewives whose husbands didn't pay enough attention to them. (I'm not proud of that. If I could have a do-over, I'd change it. But I promised my readers the unvarnished truth, and there it is.)

So, note well: If you think your wife would never do such a thing, you are wrong. If you ignore her, or pay the wrong kind of attention; if you don't give her what she needs; she can and she will find someone else who will give it to her. One of the women I was seeing on a regular basis said, "I'm a good old dog, but if you don't pet me now and then, don't expect me to stay on the porch."

I'm instinctively a Beta kind of guy. A SNAG (Sensitive New-Age Guy). A good provider. I had no idea of Game, or the Manosphere, or even what Alpha meant. (It turns out that I have a fair amount of "natural" Alpha, too. But there was one key Alpha item that I was missing.) And somehow, I slipped into a pattern of not paying attention to my wife. At least, not the kind of attention she needed.

Then one day I got the wake-up call. Something hadn't been right for a number of weeks. My sweet wife had been decidedly NOT sweet, and had grown increasingly distant. I was working on the computer one afternoon, while she was in a different part of the house, and her phone was laying there on the counter... so I picked it up and looked at her text messages.

It felt like being hit with a ton of bricks. My darling wife was in love with another guy.

In the next few minutes, the next few days, the next few weeks, I did a few things right and a lot of things wrong. I may post about what those things were, sometime. But not now; my pulse is racing just typing this. It's still hard to deal with. But the end result was that she ended the affair. In trying to figure out how to deal with my feelings about the affair, I ran across Athol Kay's blog.  I found the key ingredient that had been missing in my marriage, and I fixed it.

Within a couple of weeks, things had turned around completely. I'm as certain as is humanly possible that my wife in no longer involved with anyone other than me. She looks at me now the way she did when we were first dating. Life is good.

1 comment:

  1. That's a close one! Glad you responded appropriately. Remember, it's a method, not magic. Keep up the good work.

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