Even before I discovered MMSL, and even before I had my Red Pill moment, there were some things that I just did right. I've spent a lot of time beating myself up for the things I did wrong, and Lord knows there were plenty of them, but I want to take some time to acknowledge the things I did right:
1) I got in shape.
This is still a work in progress. When I met my wife, I was training to run a marathon. After the marathon, I didn't want to run anymore for a long time. And my weight started going back up. Before I knew it, I was up to 260 lbs and nearly a 46 inch waist. I also started having chest pains whenever I exercised. After a full cardiac workup the doc cleared me to start exercising again. I also changed my diet. I'm down to 220 lbs and a 40 inch waist. My goal is a 38 inch waist. My original goal was 200 lbs, but since I've started lifting weights and adding muscle, that may not be where I want to go. But I'm determined to get down to 38 inches around the middle, and to see my abs.
1.A) I got tested.
I have the best doc. I was talking to him about my lack of energy, difficulty concentrating, difficulty sleeping, and weight gain. I was afraid I was depressed but didn't want to take an antidepressant. He gave me this test: Take the Quiz. I answered "yes" to 9 out of the 10 questions, so he followed up with some blood work that verified I have low testosterone levels. The Androgel he prescribed has made me feel like a new man.
2) I bought some better clothes
I have a job that requires me to wear a suit to work every day. And after losing all that weight, my clothes looked pretty bad on me. So I bought a couple of new suits. The new ones are slightly more expensive, and much nicer, than the old ones. I also found a tailor who, for a few dollars, makes them fit me like they were custom made. (Still on my to-do list: buy new underwear, with no input from the Missus.)
3) I changed my look
Without consulting my wife, I went to a stylist and changed the way I wear my hair. I'm in my mid-50's and had gone quite gray, so I also added a bit of color to my hair. She came home from a business trip and found me looking 10 years younger. I also started wearing a bow tie. I have more to say about that; in fact, I think I'll do an entire post on it.
4) I went back to school
My wife has a degree in a STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Math) field; she's a scientist. I dropped out of college after three years as a fine arts major. I got a few lucky breaks and managed to end up in a job that would normally require a degree. And my employer has a great tuition reimbursement program. So I'm taking classes and working towards getting a degree. And not in Art, either. My degree is also in a STEM area. (I'm two years in, with probably two more to go. I have a 4.0 average so far, which is a major DHV in my wife's eyes.)
If you've read The Primer, you can see that I was already running the MAP without even knowing it. But all of those things I had done right couldn't make up for the things that I was doing wrong. As good as I looked, and as good as I felt, I still had to take that bitter Red Pill.